How can one discern character and integrity in an individual? If you have ever pondered this and attempted to identify significant flaws, such as dishonesty or immorality in someone, it is an incorrect lens to employ because people will always be ready to justify and defend the more obvious issues!

Instead, I propose a simple formula that I apply to myself as well as to people I encounter. If an individual fails to fulfil their verbal commitments at the time they say they will, and, in the manner they intend, it raises concerns about them and makes me uncomfortable.

This does not necessitate major wrongdoings, and there may be no tangible evidence of any misdeeds. However, the inability to meet even minor commitments is indicative of weak character. They have either not meant what they said or not thought through the implications.

For instance, consider a common scenario where someone texts you to inquire about your availability for a discussion. They subsequently send you a text message indicating their intention to call or meet at a specific time. If an agreed-upon time is reached, you anticipate receiving the call at that moment.

However, the call never materialises. An hour or so later, you receive another text message informing you that they were unexpectedly occupied!! While you may initially overlook this occurrence, there is something about this which begins to nag you from inside. The next time this occurs you know that this is a recurring pattern of behaviour for this person.

Of course, there could be genuine reasons for the inability to meet time commitments, and those should be respected. However, it is the pattern and the lack of importance given to one’s commitments that is more concerning.

In our society, this behaviour is mostly deliberate and used to demonstrate importance, status, or busyness which are all signs of a lack of depth!
Authentic individuals would never engage in such behaviour deliberately. If it does occur, they genuinely apologise and make amends in a suitable manner.

This serves as a brief example of the kind of factors to consider when evaluating someone’s character. The seemingly insignificant, day-to-day occurrences often reveal more about an individual’s true nature than any glaring areas of concern.

Worth thinking about 😊